I'm sorry Pau and Imelda, I know how you feel about this place. BUT:
FUCKING ANNOYING NEIGHBOURS GO BURN IN HELL NOW!
thankyouverymuch.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
update
So I am currently loving Ben Folds' The Luckiest.
I think it's love.
My favourite line?
I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you.
So yeah, there might be heaps more sweeter song lyric than that. But I dunno. I love it. And I know its melody is slow, too slow even, but LISTEN TO THE WORDS!! :P
And that's about it. ;)
xoxo
P.S. I told you I've nothing to write when I am happy! Too happy actually! ;)
I think it's love.
My favourite line?
I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you.
So yeah, there might be heaps more sweeter song lyric than that. But I dunno. I love it. And I know its melody is slow, too slow even, but LISTEN TO THE WORDS!! :P
And that's about it. ;)
xoxo
P.S. I told you I've nothing to write when I am happy! Too happy actually! ;)
Sunday, January 27, 2008
the wind beneath my wings. :)
The first time I learnt that Ate's getting married, (that was like 3 years ago, if I remember correctly) I cried the shit out of me. Prolly because of how I heard the news. Or more like over-heard it. When I heard dad said, "so kelan kayo magpapakasal?" to Kuya over YM voice, I stormed inside the room, with tears flooding down my cheeks and wailed at Ate, "magpapakasal ka na pala!" then went on howling. My crying prolly caught her by surprise because after all, it did surprise ME.
After releasing what seemed like barrels of tears and after enormous reassurances from dad, I became thoughtful for the moment. I asked myself why I was being negative about Ate's wedding. Why in the world would I feel sad over Ate's most special day thus far? My mind did an automatic rewind of the many years I've spent with Ate - from the day she taught me how to walk from the times she'd confront the bitches who have lots to say about me from our petty and big fights! She was there through it all - happiness, glory, shits, craps and all. And I was afraid that her getting married would put a halt to those memories. That Kuya might take her away from us - away from me. But she's my only Ate! The one who's seen the BEST and the WORST in me but loves and accepts me nonetheless. In my heart then I didn't want her to marry because I equated marriage with goodbye. I didn't tell her these, but now she knows. Hehe. I didn't want you to marry Ate, because you're my only Ate and I didn't want you to build a life without me. Because you've been (and still are) one of the biggest parts of my 23 years of existence.
But then of course she got married. I didn't stop her civil wedding. I am not an evil sister. I didn't even cry, mind you. Hehe. I have accepted that people move on. And that eventually, I will- in some way - lose the people I love.
But. I didn't really lose Ate. She now has a husband and has moved in another country. But she's still very much present in our (my) lives. With a bonus because I now have a Kuya. :) I don't get to see Ate as often as I used to back when we're still living under one house (and during then we love and hate each other! But we mostly love each other now :P) but she makes it a point to be there. To let us (me) know that she's still our Ate. She's still a Taylan. She's still the same old mataray-with-skills-of-a-man Ate Mich we've loved, and sometimes, hate. :P Not hate in its truest sense though. ;)
In 6 days Ate and Kuya are having their church wedding. It's the grandest wedding of the year, I'm telling you! :) And I am her maid-of-honour. I am honoured and proud because she considers me as her best friend. I'm sorry Mau and Nhe but Ate is my 'most' best girl friend too. :) And when I marry in the church, she'll be my maid-of-honour as well.
After releasing what seemed like barrels of tears and after enormous reassurances from dad, I became thoughtful for the moment. I asked myself why I was being negative about Ate's wedding. Why in the world would I feel sad over Ate's most special day thus far? My mind did an automatic rewind of the many years I've spent with Ate - from the day she taught me how to walk from the times she'd confront the bitches who have lots to say about me from our petty and big fights! She was there through it all - happiness, glory, shits, craps and all. And I was afraid that her getting married would put a halt to those memories. That Kuya might take her away from us - away from me. But she's my only Ate! The one who's seen the BEST and the WORST in me but loves and accepts me nonetheless. In my heart then I didn't want her to marry because I equated marriage with goodbye. I didn't tell her these, but now she knows. Hehe. I didn't want you to marry Ate, because you're my only Ate and I didn't want you to build a life without me. Because you've been (and still are) one of the biggest parts of my 23 years of existence.
But then of course she got married. I didn't stop her civil wedding. I am not an evil sister. I didn't even cry, mind you. Hehe. I have accepted that people move on. And that eventually, I will- in some way - lose the people I love.
But. I didn't really lose Ate. She now has a husband and has moved in another country. But she's still very much present in our (my) lives. With a bonus because I now have a Kuya. :) I don't get to see Ate as often as I used to back when we're still living under one house (and during then we love and hate each other! But we mostly love each other now :P) but she makes it a point to be there. To let us (me) know that she's still our Ate. She's still a Taylan. She's still the same old mataray-with-skills-of-a-man Ate Mich we've loved, and sometimes, hate. :P Not hate in its truest sense though. ;)
In 6 days Ate and Kuya are having their church wedding. It's the grandest wedding of the year, I'm telling you! :) And I am her maid-of-honour. I am honoured and proud because she considers me as her best friend. I'm sorry Mau and Nhe but Ate is my 'most' best girl friend too. :) And when I marry in the church, she'll be my maid-of-honour as well.
The blushing bride-to-be fitting her equally lovely gown :)I love you, Ate! And I wish you the grandest wedding of all time. ;) But I cannot promise not to cry. :P Haha.
xoxo
xoxo
Saturday, January 26, 2008
my hero
I regret that I didn't have time to do this yesterday. I was in Manila and had no internet.
But anyway.
Happy 48th birthday Pa! ♥
You will always be my first love. The ONLY man who'd love me unconditionally. (or at least the ONLY one who's proved it so far. :P)
YOU ARE THE BEST FATHER. People should envy us for having you. ;)
I love you.
Love,
your Buyigyig :)
But anyway.
Happy 48th birthday Pa! ♥You will always be my first love. The ONLY man who'd love me unconditionally. (or at least the ONLY one who's proved it so far. :P)
YOU ARE THE BEST FATHER. People should envy us for having you. ;)
I love you.
Love,
your Buyigyig :)
Thursday, January 24, 2008
tell her.
I know I'm supposed to be sleeping, but I just have to share this, Beautiful.
Someone calls me beautiful. He calls me that so naturally it feels like I've been baptised with it. See, I've always known I'm not ugly. After all, I was the muse of my class ever since I started attending school. That's something, right? But to have someone tell you you're beautiful, more so call you beautiful as if it's your given name is something else.
So thank you. For finding me beautiful. And for being man enough to say it every so often. Beauty begets beauty, you know. ;)
And yes, please tell your lady/wife/mother/friend that she is beautiful. It does matter. And as how Megan would put it, it matters like breath.
---
I'm supposed to be writing about our trip but I bet anyone who's been to Malaysia and Singapore can tell you that, and more. So I'll just share one important lesson I've learned while I was on that trip.
To be a mother is to not be afraid to look like an idiot. You should not be afraid to make a scene or to serve as an entertainment to the other 50+ bored, waiting passengers at the airport's departure lounge. Not to mention the foreign people at the train! Or those watching Songs of the Sea!
So yeah, I am a mother and I am not afraid. :)
For photos of the trip (because pictures speak of a thousand words! :P) go to my multiply. Y'all know the drill. ;)
Also, I just wanna say that that trip with my family is the best! And that I have the best family in the world. ♥
Good night!
xoxo
Someone calls me beautiful. He calls me that so naturally it feels like I've been baptised with it. See, I've always known I'm not ugly. After all, I was the muse of my class ever since I started attending school. That's something, right? But to have someone tell you you're beautiful, more so call you beautiful as if it's your given name is something else.
So thank you. For finding me beautiful. And for being man enough to say it every so often. Beauty begets beauty, you know. ;)
And yes, please tell your lady/wife/mother/friend that she is beautiful. It does matter. And as how Megan would put it, it matters like breath.
---
I'm supposed to be writing about our trip but I bet anyone who's been to Malaysia and Singapore can tell you that, and more. So I'll just share one important lesson I've learned while I was on that trip.
To be a mother is to not be afraid to look like an idiot. You should not be afraid to make a scene or to serve as an entertainment to the other 50+ bored, waiting passengers at the airport's departure lounge. Not to mention the foreign people at the train! Or those watching Songs of the Sea!
So yeah, I am a mother and I am not afraid. :)
For photos of the trip (because pictures speak of a thousand words! :P) go to my multiply. Y'all know the drill. ;)
Also, I just wanna say that that trip with my family is the best! And that I have the best family in the world. ♥
Good night!
xoxo
Friday, January 11, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
polarity
Amazing how one minute we're getting drunk, mumbling silly things and pouring our hearts out and hearing needles crashing to the ground the next. Picking the pieces of every thing that crazy shattered.
P.S. I still feel enormously and gigantically. Period.
P.P.S. I have the same entry on my real diary. Good job virtual one!
P.S. I still feel enormously and gigantically. Period.
P.P.S. I have the same entry on my real diary. Good job virtual one!
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
update
I have a "real" diary. And then I realized that when I'm happy, as in real happy, I've nothing to write about. Like I just wanna own my happiness screwthewholeworld.
So yeah virtual diary, I've nothing to write about. For now at least. :)
P.S. I am really enormously, gigantically happy!
Love,
Yengpie
So yeah virtual diary, I've nothing to write about. For now at least. :)
P.S. I am really enormously, gigantically happy!
Love,
Yengpie
Sunday, January 6, 2008
cooled down
But then now that I've vent out all my anger and my rational-not-so-angry neurons have returned, I actually realize that I only have 70% hate for this place. Heh.
Let me remind myself of the 30%:
We have two maids here. Both love Giann the same way they loved his father.
One of the maids is an expert cook and I've always loved how delish meals here are!
Our room has everything we need (2 desktop computers - one for Pau and one for me, air conditioner, wall fan, TV, DVD player and an insect catcher - dunno if this is a good thing though)
Pau's mum will do everything for Pau, Giann and I. And I super appreciate her for that.
Our new car. Now, we can take Giann anywhere and everywhere we wish too.
And of course, Pau's happy to be here. Which is the foremost reason why we're here anyways.
Oh I'm sure there's more but they escape me at the moment. So sorry God for being such a whiny brat earlier. I swear if only you would allow a rain of fire to extinguish our loud, annoying (and I refuse to say more negative adjectives) neighbours and nuisance insects and if only you'd make our roads wider, and if mum, dad, ate, kuya, shobe and EJ would live much closer here (if not exactly here) then I promise NEVER to complain again. I'd be happy and contented to be here then.
Love,
your prodigal daughter, Yeng
Let me remind myself of the 30%:
We have two maids here. Both love Giann the same way they loved his father.
One of the maids is an expert cook and I've always loved how delish meals here are!
Our room has everything we need (2 desktop computers - one for Pau and one for me, air conditioner, wall fan, TV, DVD player and an insect catcher - dunno if this is a good thing though)
Pau's mum will do everything for Pau, Giann and I. And I super appreciate her for that.
Our new car. Now, we can take Giann anywhere and everywhere we wish too.
And of course, Pau's happy to be here. Which is the foremost reason why we're here anyways.
Oh I'm sure there's more but they escape me at the moment. So sorry God for being such a whiny brat earlier. I swear if only you would allow a rain of fire to extinguish our loud, annoying (and I refuse to say more negative adjectives) neighbours and nuisance insects and if only you'd make our roads wider, and if mum, dad, ate, kuya, shobe and EJ would live much closer here (if not exactly here) then I promise NEVER to complain again. I'd be happy and contented to be here then.
Love,
your prodigal daughter, Yeng
i don't care what y'all say...
I ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY HATE THIS GOD-FORSAKEN PLACE.
There. I feel much better.
There. I feel much better.
Saturday, January 5, 2008
a soulful relationship
I found this somewhere (yes, I forgot exactly where and when). It's a good read. :)
I like the first and the last parts most. ;)
P.S. I'm happy! ♥
xoxo
An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye."
Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem, make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really important.
Once you decide to commit to someone, over time his or her flaws, vulnerabilities, pet peeves, and differences will become more obvious. If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you've got to learn to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you. You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs, values, dreams, weaknesses, and strengths. You are two unique individual children of God who have decided to share a life together.
Neither of you are perfect, but are you perfect for each other? Do you bring out the best in each other?
Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare, and control? What do you bring to the relationship? Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain? You can't take someone to the altar to alter him or her. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay.
If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life", you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain.
Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness, and selfishness are not the ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship! Seeking status, sex, wealth, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.
What keeps a relationship strong?
Communication, intimacy, trust, a sense of humor, sharing household tasks, some getaway time without business or children and daily exchanges (a meal, shared activity, a hug, a call, a touch, a note).
Leave a nice message on the voicemail or send a nice email.
Sharing common goals and interests. Growth is important. Grow together, not away from each other, giving each other space to grow without feeling insecure. Allow your mate to have outside interest. You can't always be together. Give each other a sense of belonging and assurances of commitment. Don't try to control one another. Learn each other's family situation. Respect his or her parents regardless.
Don't put pressure on each other for material goods. Remember for richer or for poorer. If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty, and pain replace the passion.
The difference between 'United' and 'Untied' is where you put the i.
I like the first and the last parts most. ;)
P.S. I'm happy! ♥
xoxo
Friday, January 4, 2008
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
and so you cannot relate. bleah.
I'm so enormously happy to have just this alone. It doesn't really matter that it will never be anything more than this. This is plenty enough.
You have that on me.
---
I think I will be on blog leave for a while. Think being the Mega-Multi-Millionaire keyword here. MUST DO THESIS PROPOSAL IN 4 DAYS. MUST GIVE IT TO THE PANELISTS FIRST THING MONDAY OF NEXT WEEK. MUST DEFEND IT BEFORE JANUARY 11. *coverseyesandtakesthatonebigleapoffaith*
Hello I am Queen Procrastinator, apprentice of The Master. :P
---
Oh and also, I don't think I got the Sunlife job. Then again, maybe, just maybe, it wasn't meant for me. I am still the eternal sunshine girl, refusing to be put down by life's disappointments. I'll have my moment. Soon. ;)
Love,
the-beautiful-messy-twisted-sunshine super girl!
You have that on me.
---
I think I will be on blog leave for a while. Think being the Mega-Multi-Millionaire keyword here. MUST DO THESIS PROPOSAL IN 4 DAYS. MUST GIVE IT TO THE PANELISTS FIRST THING MONDAY OF NEXT WEEK. MUST DEFEND IT BEFORE JANUARY 11. *coverseyesandtakesthatonebigleapoffaith*
Hello I am Queen Procrastinator, apprentice of The Master. :P
---
Oh and also, I don't think I got the Sunlife job. Then again, maybe, just maybe, it wasn't meant for me. I am still the eternal sunshine girl, refusing to be put down by life's disappointments. I'll have my moment. Soon. ;)
Love,
the-beautiful-messy-twisted-sunshine super girl!
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
happy new me!
Around 1:30 AM today I received this message:
"Happy new year Yeng. Though you may not be happy to hear from me. Please say the same for Mau and Nhe. Thanks. -Cheka."
For a moment there I was dumbfounded. Then without second thought I hit reply:
"Happy new year Yeng. Though you may not be happy to hear from me. Please say the same for Mau and Nhe. Thanks. -Cheka."
For a moment there I was dumbfounded. Then without second thought I hit reply:
"ZOMG Cheska! Happy new year! I am happy to hear from you, really. Whatever happened before doesn't matter anymore. It's in the past. I hope you're alright."
And I was happy about it. :) I guess I won't be bashing bash me 3 for a long time! Hahaha.
---
It was my first ever New Year here at Pau's. It was fun because for the longest period of time, my new year has been diminished to watching (super duper amazing) fireworks display from the 11th floor of our condominium. So being in a neighbourhood where children as young as 7 know how to light a firecracker is alien to me! We had our early media noche at Pau's lola's house because I wanted to be home by 12 midnight to be with my sleeping beauty boy. :P It was great to be surrounded by over 10 familiar faces while watching the fireworks. Cause before it has always been my immediate family that I get to spend the new year's eve with. Not that it's a bad thing. Just that, it's nice to celebrate new year's eve in a different way, with different people. :) But still, I missed our little condo last night. I missed the grand display of fireworks. I missed mama's money-throwing "pamahiin" and beating shobe, ate and EJ to it! Hehe. I missed mama's "pamahiin" (yet again! yes she has a lot! :P) of hanging 7 pieces of grapes in each and every door in our house. I missed our little table filled with 8 kinds of rounded fruits and chocolates even! But then again as I said, it's good to experience "different" once in awhile. Sure we didn't have expensive, amazing fireworks display here in Laguna and all this neighbourhood had were lusis, fountain, watusi, whistle bomb, sinturon ni lolo and those little triangle (whose name escapes me) but it still was a celebration definitely worth remembering. After all, it was my first new year's eve with Pau and Giann. ;)
Happy 2008 everyone! ♥
Love, Peace and Happiness,
Yeng
And I was happy about it. :) I guess I won't be bashing bash me 3 for a long time! Hahaha.
---
It was my first ever New Year here at Pau's. It was fun because for the longest period of time, my new year has been diminished to watching (super duper amazing) fireworks display from the 11th floor of our condominium. So being in a neighbourhood where children as young as 7 know how to light a firecracker is alien to me! We had our early media noche at Pau's lola's house because I wanted to be home by 12 midnight to be with my sleeping beauty boy. :P It was great to be surrounded by over 10 familiar faces while watching the fireworks. Cause before it has always been my immediate family that I get to spend the new year's eve with. Not that it's a bad thing. Just that, it's nice to celebrate new year's eve in a different way, with different people. :) But still, I missed our little condo last night. I missed the grand display of fireworks. I missed mama's money-throwing "pamahiin" and beating shobe, ate and EJ to it! Hehe. I missed mama's "pamahiin" (yet again! yes she has a lot! :P) of hanging 7 pieces of grapes in each and every door in our house. I missed our little table filled with 8 kinds of rounded fruits and chocolates even! But then again as I said, it's good to experience "different" once in awhile. Sure we didn't have expensive, amazing fireworks display here in Laguna and all this neighbourhood had were lusis, fountain, watusi, whistle bomb, sinturon ni lolo and those little triangle (whose name escapes me) but it still was a celebration definitely worth remembering. After all, it was my first new year's eve with Pau and Giann. ;)
Happy 2008 everyone! ♥
Love, Peace and Happiness,
Yeng
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