I am Mother.

If there's one thing I learnt from being a mother it is that I have to be thankful of Giann more than he should be thankful of me. Sure I did risk my life for him, went through all the cons pregnancy and post pregnancy have to offer. And sure I've sacrificed a hell lot because of (and for) him. Then again, all those are nothing compared to what he's brought (and still bringing) in my life.

Because of Giann, I've learnt to be responsible and mature. Those two adjectives can never go with my name before I had him, but now, I am those. I've realised that I have to be an "extra" person because a little boy is clinging his life to me. I have to be extra patient, careful, thoughtful and smart because someone's depending on me. It's overwhelming if you think about it but I would never trade it for ANYTHING or ANYONE else in the world.

It's true that motherhood isn't as "elegant" as it seems. It is NOT easy. And I have to learn that every single day as I tend to Giann. It's an every hour, every minute process for me. Motherhood teaches me things I will NEVER ever learn from graduate school or in the corporate world. Example? NOTHING IS GREATER THAN YOUR OWN CHILD'S GIGGLES!

The late Heath Ledger couldn't have expressed parenting any better when he said: "You're forced into, kind of, respecting yourself more. You learn more about yourself through your child, I guess. I think you also look at death differently. It's like a catch 22: I feel good about dying now because I feel like I'm alive in her, you know, but at the same hand, you don't want to die because you want to be around for the rest of her life."

I have discovered a lot about myself because of Giann. He's helping me get to know myself better as we spend each and every day together. Amazing how a little, innocent person can have so much impact in someone's life!

God how glad I am that I'm a mother. There are heaps of things and events in my life that I would've done differently, but having Giann is not one of them. It is the most right thing I have EVER done. Words can never do justice to how much I love my son. He's my joy, love, pride and ultimate little guy in the whole Universe. :)

So thank you Giann for coming into mummy's life. You make me lose sleep and stress me at times but I will never ever EVER want it any other way. :)

I love you Boching! ♥

P.S. speaking of Giann, his two lower teeth are visible now! That when I give him my finger to bite, it's impossible not to scream "ouch!" and it would make him giggle more. Haha.

xoxo
the proud SuperMum