i couldn't find words

"Mum"

I've been wanting to write about something but I wanted to make my first entry about it amazingly beautiful it would top all my other past entries. Well, okay, at least be at par with how I talk about having Giann.

3 months after I still don't know what to say. Heh.

So I guess I should just say it like it is.

I'm four months pregnant with my second child! :)

I know I said I won't be pregnant until Pau and Giann are mature/old enough for another baby. I was surprised though. I told Pau about it and he was ecstatic. He put Giann on his lap and was like, "now you're all mine!" Of course Giann protested. :P But I was relieved to know that I'd only have a hard time with Giann. Pau's embraced his fatherhood. Although his mum still hasn't. But anyway... I'm really excited to have another baby! Pregnancy is hard and makes me uber fat but it's a worthwhile experience. Nothing will ever beat the feeling of having a baby. Really.

Now I'm super excited to know if she's a she or a he! I want a she. I want a little Yeng! :P Giann IS a little Yeng in so many ways but I can't dress him up with cute pink dresses! Haha. At the same time I want another he, so he can defend himself when Giann wrestles him! :P I'm actually preparing myself for Royal Rumble in our room. Heh.

But of course it's not an entire glorious ride. My BP shoots up every day. When I was pregnant with Giann, I was pre-eclamtic. One reason why I delivered via CS. But now, my BP's shooting up every single day. Makes me feel terrible. I guess it's because when I was pregnant with Giann, I only have to look after myself and focus on my pregnancy. Now I commute every single day to work, I have CRL for a boss (worst ever!), I stress over work, then when I get home I have Pau and Giann to look after. It's NOT easy. My pregnancy with Giann was a breeze. I live with mum then and was well taken cared of. Now, I only have myself. There's Pau but he's a boy! He's not FULLY aware of what it's like to be pregnant - to have your hormones work overtime, get silly morning sickness, and feel sleepy 70% of the day.

But overall the baby and I are the doing good. :) Of course Giann wrestles us most of the time but he's okay. I have to worry about his being possesive of me when his little sibling comes but I guess every first born had to go through that process. Giann's a smart kid; I know he'll handle. :) And just because I've a new born doesn't mean I'll take him for granted. Giann's too much of a cutie to be neglected!

P.S. Now y'all know why I'm such a lazy terrible blogger the past months.

Super P.S. I realised I've weird menstrual period. When Ate announced she was pregnant I had monthly period but now I'm actually going to deliver days earlier than she! It was also the same case for Giann - I still had my period although I'm already a month pregnant with him.

xoxo